Bunny or Bear?

In my last post, They Didn't Promise You a Rose Garden, I talked about unique types of stressors military women face including working in a hyper-masculine environment. In this post, I talk about trauma triggers, our body's stress response system, and knowing the difference between a bunny and a bear. Promise, it'll make sense once you read it.


Traumatic events can happen to anyone, but the likelihood of experiencing a traumatic event increases under certain circumstance (e.g. war and combat, violent and abusive relationships, places where natural disasters and terrorism are common). Women are especillay suceptible to sexual trauma and violence in intimate relationships. Females between the ages of 12 to 34 are also more vulnerable to experiencing sexually related trauma.  

The Department of justice (2013) found that between 2005-2010, females between the ages of 12 to 34 were victims of sexual violence “at a rate of about 4 victimizations per 1,000, compared to a rate of 1.5 victimizations per 1,000 for females ages 35 to 64 and 0.2 per 1,000 for age 65 or older” (U.S. Department of Justice [DOJ], 2013, p. 3).

What Does Fight, Flight, Freeze Look Like?

Our body is hard-wired for trauma response.  It's part of our basic make-up and necessary for survival.  When our body perceives a threat (real or imagined) it sets off a chain reaction involving our brain and bodies causing our bodies to prep for an immediate response.   This stress response system is sometimes referred to as the fight, flight, or freeze response

Fight, fight, and freeze responses are different for everyone.  Below are some common responses.

Fight 

• Crying
• Hands in fists, desire to punch or strike
• Flexed/tight jaw, grinding teeth, snarl
• Fight in eyes, glaring
• Desire to stomp, kick, smash with legs, feet
• Feelings of anger/rage
• Knotted stomach/nausea, burning stomach

Flight 

• Restless legs, feet
• Numbness in legs
• Anxiety/shallow breathing
• Big/darting eyes
• Leg/foot movement
• Fidgetiness or restlessness
• Feeling trapped, tense
• Tensing up

Freeze 

• Feeling stuck in some part of the body
• Feeling cold/frozen, numb
• Sense of stiffness, heaviness
• Holding breath/restricted breathing
• Sense of dread, heart pounding
• Decreased heart rate (can sometimes increase)
• Blanking out (having your mind go completely blank)
• Clamming up (not knowing what to say or being able to speak)
• Physical shutdown or fainting

Bunny vs. Bear

Imagine for a moment if we look at the traumatic experience as being attacked by a bear.  Bear attacks are not a common experience. Bear attacks do happen, but they usually happen in certain environmental conditions, mostly in the woods.  That being said occasionally bears do wander into populated areas.  There is a good reason to fear a bear.  Bear attacks can be fatal.  From what I've read bear attacks can be sudden and unexpected.

I've never been attacked by a bear, but I imagine it's not an easy thing to forget.  If I was attacked, I'm not sure if I'd return to the place where it happened.  If I did, I would be on high alert listening for the faintest rustling or twig snapping. I might make sure I kept a weapon close by for safety.  I’d likely be easily alarmed by unexplained sounds, assuming a bear is close.  

But what if it isn't. Lots of animals exist in the wild, not all of them as dangerous as a bear.  For all, I know the rustling could be a bunny. The problem is my automatic stress response system is responding to a perceived threat.  Its sole objective is to keep me safe, it isn't trying to determine if the rustling is being caused by a bunny or a bear.

A more seasoned person, someone trained on how to respond in traumatic situations, might be able to distinguish a bear from a bunny.  For example, military service members are trained to know when a threat is real. It is an essential combat skill that can prevent unnecessary loss of life. However, the average person isn't trained for combat or may never have had to put that training in use.  Also, some traumatic experiences are hard to train for as in the case of abuse or sexual assault.

I want to talk for a moment about the relationship between PTSD and our body's stress response system. As I mentioned in my earlier post, Through the Trauma Looking Glass, when we experience trauma our body kicks into survival mode.  Take my experience after my attack.  In the weeks after my attack, my brain believed everything had the potential to be a bear. My body remained in survival mode. My heart raced and I tensed up every time I entered my apartment complex.

What Happens When Your Brain Gets Stuck in Survival Mode? 

When your body perceives a threat, your amygdala (emotion center) sounds the alarm and sends chemicals (neurotransmitters) through your body to help you prepare to fight or flee. It also diverts energy from your thinking brain to allow for an automatic response.  What that means your ability to think effectively is diminished. Your thinking brain takes a back seat and your emotional brain takes over.  

In the short-term, this isn't a problem.  Let's imagine your house is on fire.  It's probably more important to leave the house in your pajamas than it is to take the time to make yourself presentable.  Your first impulse is to run out of the burning house.  You probably hadn't even considered that you were in pajamas.

The problem comes when your brain can't tell between real threats and imagined ones.  Our body's alarm system isn't always accurate. Sometimes our brain issues a false alarm.  This is especially the case if the original threat was particularly traumatic.  Added to that is the fact that our brain uses our previous traumatic experience to program the system. 

For, example if the last bear attack took place upstate and happened while we in the tent listening to a Miley Cyrus our brain may associate those things to the bear attack.  I might avoid going to that particular are, a particular sight (e.g. tree type), or sound (Miley Cyrus) may trigger feelings of anxiety and panic.  It doesn't even matter if you are in your car at the time the song comes on.  It can also occur days, weeks, or months after the attack.

So How Do I Teach My Brain the Difference Between a Real and Imagined Threat?

Glad you asked.  Not all experiences are life-threatening, but it's important to know our bodies are programmed for survival. Our bodies are wired for survival. Fight, flight or freeze is the body’s automatic response to a perceived threat.  It is an adaptive survival response, alerting us to danger and preparing us to respond to threats.  We can't always control the way our body responds. Our body responds in the way it thinks is best to survive the encounter.

Reprogramming your brain to know the difference requires activating the part of your body (parasympathetic nervous system) that is responsible for helping your body relax. It also requires the ability to (a) notice and identify the signs of emotional distress (b) pay attention to trauma triggers and recognize situations causing you distress and (3) practice using coping skills.

For me, the first step was making sure I was in a safe space before I attempted to reprogram my brain. I didn't want to take the risk of ignoring valid signals or rationalize myself out of taking safety precautions.  For example, if I'm lying in bed when I hear glass crashing and rather than check I tell myself it's all in my head.  It might very well be, but I can still listen closely and have my phone handy in case I need to dial 911.   

On the other hand, let's say I have a robust alarm system with camera's installed and I'm sure I turned it on.  I might check the camera's and/or verify the alarm system is working, but afterward, I'm going to try to help my brain calm down so I can sleep.

Perhaps one of the most important things I try to do is practice deep breathing.  Seven to ten deep breathes have been proven to activate the body's parasympathetic nervous system provided you do it right.  You may be telling yourself, I've been breathing my whole life, I know how to breathe.  You are correct. If you are currently conscious, you know how to breathe to live.  Breathing to relax is slightly different.  

Breathing for relaxation, sometimes called diaphragmatic breathing or belly breathing, involves breathing that causes your stomach to expand and contract.  This allows your body to get a full intake of air, activating your body's parasympathetic nervous system.  Chest breathing restricts the intake of air.  I've included a link to diaphragmatic breathing and a video in case you want to try it. I'll be sharing more tips on how to reset your brain's alarm system in my upcoming post titled Become Stress Resistant.  

It can be difficult discerning real from perceived threats.  Ultimately, you may need the help of a trained professional mental health provider.  A qualified mental health provider was able to help me identify my trauma triggers and teach me coping skills. I'm not going to lie, it takes practice to be able to reprogram your brain, but it is possible.   

Here are some videos about the Body's Stress Response.

The Fight, Flight, Freeze Response - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEHwB1PG_-Q

Fight or Flight: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aDVQXbNrpkU

Here is a video about how stress affects our body.  It's kind of jargon-y but it's short,

How Stress Affects Your Body - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v-t1Z5-oPtU

In my next post, Picking Through the Rubble, I talk about the time my brain got stuck in survival mode.  I also discuss share my thoughts on how to find a a good therapist. 

This article about breathing and stress is from Harvard Medical School.  If you can't trust Harvard, who can you trust? 

Learning diaphragmatic breathing - https://www.health.harvard.edu/lung-health-and-disease/learning-diaphragmatic-breathing

Here is a helpful video for my visual learners:

The Ultimate Relaxation Technique: How to Practice Diaphragmatic Breathing for Beginners - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vca6DyFqt4c

This is a great book to read if you want to understand more about the impact of trauma:

The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D. (Author)

Link: https://www.amazon.com/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma/dp/0143127748/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1544420383&sr=8-1&keywords=the+body+keeps+the+score